well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
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