I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Randomize
