When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
