Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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