You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize