I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
