I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
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