even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Randomize
