HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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