Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
Randomize
