woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Randomize
