New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
