O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Randomize
