I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Randomize
