Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
