The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
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