I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
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