Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
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