Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
