ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Michael Bay diarrhea
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Randomize
