I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
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