I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Randomize
