These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
