But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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