He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize