do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Randomize
