Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Sorry about my life...
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Randomize
