Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
