dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I just googled if crying burns calories
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize