just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
