I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Randomize
