just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
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