trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
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