Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
