How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
