why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
where are you?
Hypothermia
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Randomize
