Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
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