My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
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