i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
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