Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize