Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
How does one acquire holy water?
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
