i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
