U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
