he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Do you have feelings for this penis?
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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