Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
