this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
