So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
