Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
Do you still have your period?
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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