It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Randomize
