Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
it's like iHOP with fire
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
