I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
