I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
